The papery-est tiger in the land, busted, Broadway Joe bullies successfully, and the Terry Tate sneers at the unholy lifting of the cellar.
Sure, let’s start with the one guy everyone loves to sneer at...me. Forget for a moment that you have to get to two-losses in the Patriot Division to find a team with fewer points-for. Look no further than the Sentinels in second place behind a team that they’re clearly better than (on paper). A few favorable matchups, some timely (or untimely, depending on your perspective) injuries, and a few helpful waiver wire pickups have put me at 4-0 for the first time since LaDainian Tomlinson really mattered. (I’m guessing at that one, but I do seem to remember winning a lot back then.) And I did it on the backs of the same guys that were crushing my beloved Jets. Oh, the agony. During a regular weekend (hopefully meaning “a weekend you’re not facing me”), Finley and Wayne will do better for you, Eric.
Meanwhile, the BMOs were favored by 28.5 in a matchup they were supposed to win in a walk. And with Stafford, Calvin Johnson and Nicks, it should have been...and then Frank Gore goes and shows people what he is (uh, used to be) made of. And then, the Mike Simon gets his groove on. Cam Newton thrills. Matt Bryant pulled a double-triple (that’s 3-for-3 on XPs and FGs, folks). Fred Jackson crosses the stripe for the fourth week. And...well, David Nelson got silenced by Cincy. Not that you could have necessarily guessed, Mike, but starting David Nelson (which looked sure-fire to me, man) turned out to be worse than Mike Thomas. Ugh.
Suzie Kolber’s sons heard the call, and got off the schneid this week, with all pistons firing in the direction of a bunch of guys who hang around on street corners late at night. When you can say that you sat Blount and you only sacrificed 5 points, you must be doing something right. Barak really only got let down by the Steelers’ D, but they would have had to score and dominate to really have made the difference here.
Which brings us to the bottom of the Patriot Division. Both Jason’s and Nieve’s squads laid eggs this past weekend, losing by more than 50 points each. Nieve, you’ll know better in the future that the Curtis Painter will know how to deliver the ball to Indy’s WRs, so your score will look more respectable. Jason, I’d like to think that the Steelers’ O-line will figure out how to keep Big Ben from getting mauled, and I do hope that the guy’s foot is okay, but when you go up against a guy starting Aaron Rodgers and Matt Forte, you’re going to have to hope for heavy rain.
High Scorin' Mo-Fos
Team: 142.5, Tennen QB: 47.0, Aaron Rodgers (Tennen)
RB: 31.0, Beanie Wells (Scott)
WR: 42.0, Welker (Jason)
TE: 24.0, Jimmy Graham (Bob)
DE: 29.0, Ravens (Russ)
PK: 17.0, Jason Hansen (Tennen)
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